The school threw us a Halloween party, reserving some club in the theater district for the students, once again proving that open bars and 20 minute waits per drink round go hand in hand. “Hi, could I get uh, 28 shots of SoCo and lime please?”
I was a box of wine, Franzia® Chiblis to be exact. Sandwich board, some rubber bands, 10 bucks in paint supplies and done. One guy was super dedicated, shaved his head to go along with his monk costume, and alas there was one dude that showed up wearing his scrubs splattered with some fake blood. I mean, dental school… costume party…. show up wearing scrubs….. that kind of douchebaggery is on par with oh say, wearing your high school letterman’s jacket post graduation. Talk about a landslide victory in the lazy and lame costume award category.
And of course for girls, sexy:
a) nurse
b) devil
c) angel
d) girl-scout
e) catholic school girl
cover pretty much 90% of the costumes at any Halloween party. What is it with girls who feel the need to preface every costume outing with “oh my god these skirts are soooooo short! I had no idea they’d be ride up this high!”? Yes you knew, but honestly, it’s ok, you don’t need a disclaimer, Halloween is de-facto an opportunity for you to dress slutty without being called on it. Trust us, we already know who the slutty ones are….
There was a boob painter at the party, a hired boob painter! Her job, in case you need an explanation, was to paint and glitter the chests of girls who lined up at the front of the dance floor. How does one get that job? Can I be the understudy??? Forget dental school, I want to get started on a boob-painting apprenticeship ASAP.